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have you ever felt so... empty? like, you don't know what to do and severely you just lost...
this morning, i make my bed and tidying up my bedroom and my bathroom, then in the middle of the moment when i was emptying the trash bin, suddenly I didn't know where I was. i mean, it is very real. so, i stopped doing anything. i came back to my bedroom and i sat down. the question came into my head, where.. are.. you? and i answered it, i am at my room. and those voice on my mind asked again, "but where?" and i said, i don't know. and the next question was, the question from myself to myself, "who are you? and what do you want to do?" the answer it is the same "I DON'T KNOW"
is it just me or other people feel this? you answer it. Is it the feeling when you turned 20 so it was like a starting point of your life?
i tried several ways, i listen to podcasts, i watch TED, i listen to some relaxing musics, i read books, i joined a committee, i have a lot of friends, i have a family, i have my laptop, i have my handphone, i have enough money to live, i have my favorite maroon nail polish, i have my bike, i have my beautiful clothes, but why it is feel sooooooooo eeeemmmpppttty? is it just because i dont respect myself enough? do i complain a lot? do i have done nothing? do i cursed at people? am i a bad person? am i ugly? am i stupid? yes.
okay, now i know the answer.
I don't know who i was. i don't respect myself. I do everything for people but forgot to do something for myself. I never talked to myself. I didn't who i was so that i don't know what I am going to do. i don't who what i am going to be. i don't know me.
I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me.
this morning, i make my bed and tidying up my bedroom and my bathroom, then in the middle of the moment when i was emptying the trash bin, suddenly I didn't know where I was. i mean, it is very real. so, i stopped doing anything. i came back to my bedroom and i sat down. the question came into my head, where.. are.. you? and i answered it, i am at my room. and those voice on my mind asked again, "but where?" and i said, i don't know. and the next question was, the question from myself to myself, "who are you? and what do you want to do?" the answer it is the same "I DON'T KNOW"
is it just me or other people feel this? you answer it. Is it the feeling when you turned 20 so it was like a starting point of your life?
i tried several ways, i listen to podcasts, i watch TED, i listen to some relaxing musics, i read books, i joined a committee, i have a lot of friends, i have a family, i have my laptop, i have my handphone, i have enough money to live, i have my favorite maroon nail polish, i have my bike, i have my beautiful clothes, but why it is feel sooooooooo eeeemmmpppttty? is it just because i dont respect myself enough? do i complain a lot? do i have done nothing? do i cursed at people? am i a bad person? am i ugly? am i stupid? yes.
okay, now i know the answer.
I don't know who i was. i don't respect myself. I do everything for people but forgot to do something for myself. I never talked to myself. I didn't who i was so that i don't know what I am going to do. i don't who what i am going to be. i don't know me.
I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me. I don't know me.
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